Before Coffee: Bellend

June 15, 2016 § Leave a comment

The brain is on random and the nose is just on. As in dripping like a leaky tap.

It’s day two of what I’ve discovered (thanks to Dr. Google) is “nonallergic rhinitis”—hay fever without the hay. I had a “procedure” on Monday that involved sedation and oxygen, and apparently the O2 dries out the sinuses and causes all the symptoms of an apocalyptic allergy attack. Watery eyes, sneezing, and a never-ending stream of fluid dripping from the nose.

The fun part? Because it’s “nonallergic,” allergy medicines don’t help. Sudafed does a bit, and Rhinocort helps long enough to get about six hours of sleep, but you can only use that once every 24 hours. Otherwise, I’d be huffing it like Lloyd Bridges sniffing glue in Airplane!

sniffing-glue-o

Anyway, Dr. Google says it lasts about four days, so I’m going to be miserable the rest of this week. Fun!

As for the brain being on random, the British slang term “bellend” popped into my head this morning, and I began wondering about its etymology. I guessed that it originally meant a “loud, obnoxious person,” and the comparison was to the bell end of a trumpet.

Um, no.

My Brit friends are sniggering at me right now, and rightfully so. It’s decidedly more vulgar than that, referring to the glans of the male member. Ha.

The pool is still cloudy, but getting clearer at a staggeringly slow pace. Added some words to the novel last night, in between the sneezing and dripping.

Still waiting for that head transplant, which apparently isn’t too far off in the future. So at least I’ve got that going for me.

tap

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